Day Twenty-One: "Love is Satisfied in God"

"The Lord will continually guide you, and satisfy your desire." 

Isaiah 58:11

Day 20 was a vitally important day in the Love Dare – and in your life. You came face-to-face with the glaring need of every human heart. Whether this is new territory for you or if you’ve been a follower of Jesus for quite a while, now is the time for you to firm up one thing in your mind: you need God every single day. This is not a part-time proposition. He alone can satisfy, even when all else fails you.

Your husband may be late coming home. Again. But God will always be right on time.

Your wife may let you down. Again. But God can always be trusted to deliver on His promises.

Every day you place expectations on your spouse. Sometimes they meet them. Sometimes they don’t. But never will they be able to totally satisfy all the demands you ask of them – partly because some of your demands are unreasonable, partly because your mate is human.

God, however, is not. And those who approach Him in utter dependence each day for the real needs in their life are the ones who find out just how dependable He is.

There are needs in your life only God can fully satisfy. Though your husband or wife is able to complete some of these requirements – at least now and then – only God is able to do it all. Your need for love. Your need for acceptance. Your need for joy. It’s time to stop expecting somebody or something to keep your functioning and fulfilled on a non-stop basis. Only God can do that as you learn to depend on Him. But He wants to do it His way. “My God will supply all your need according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:19).

The needs of love, peace, and adequacy are real. No one is saying you shouldn’t have them. But rather than plugging into things that are unstable at best and are subject to change – your health, your money, even the affections and best intentions of your mate – plug into God instead. He’s the only One in your life that can never change. His faithfulness, His truth, and His promises to His children will always remain. That’s why you need to seek Him every day.

Jesus once spoke to a woman at a Samaritan well, a woman who had tried getting her needs met through a string of failed relationships. With both her life and water bucket empty, she had come to this place broken and hardened yet still desperately in need. But in Christ she found what He called “living water” (John 4:10) – a supply that wasn’t just for quenching temporary thirst. What He offered her was a drink of soul satisfaction that never quits giving and refreshing. And that is what’s available to you each morning at sunrise and each night before bed, no matter who your spouse is what they’ve done to you.
      God is your everyday supply. Of everything you need.

The Dare: "Be intentional today about making time to pray and read your Bible. Try reading a chapter out of Proverbs each day (there are thirty-one – a full month’s supply), or reading a chapter in the Gospels (Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John).  As you do, immerse yourself in the love and promises God has for you.  This will add to your growth as you walk." 

The Outcome:  I will be the first to admit I expect a lot from Nate. If left unchecked, my expectations would far exceed anything humanly attainable. But what about the little things? Is it too much to ask for my husband to act like he is attracted to me? Would it be too demanding to ask that he hold my hand or open a door for me? Would it seem too "needy" to imply I'd like hand-delivered flowers once in a blue moon? 

These are all things we women would LIKE for our spouses to do. But is it reasonable, or even fair, to not only expect these things but require them in order for us to feel loved? And what if we take it a step farther and choose to only show them affection after they fulfill our demands. I'm speaking from personal experience. This was me. 

There was a point in our marriage that I decided I would no longer show my husband love because I didn't feel loved. After all, if my love bank was empty, I sure didn't have anything to give to him. It was his fault anyway for acting like I no longer exist. He didn't deserve my affection....or so I thought. The person I wound up hurting the most in the end was myself. I had an opportunity. I could've chosen to love him despite our circumstances. I could've taken things in my own hands and made our marriage better. I could've shown him unconditional love...but a vital component was missing. My relationship with God. Was God still in my heart? Sure. But we hadn't talked in a LONG time. Nor did I care to hear what he had to say about my situation.

In the past couple of days, we've learned that a love that stands the trials of life is unconditional. And it's also unattainable, unless you are first receiving it from God. If he is dormant in your life and in your heart, you aren't actively receiving that love. It's a love that has to be replenished every day. Through a prayer. Through His word. Through music. You have to keep the communication lines open to keep the love flowing. 


Day 21: SUCCESS

19 days and counting...