"I Am Enough"

"The LORD your God is with you, 

   the Mighty Warrior who saves. 

He will take great delight in you; 

   in his love he will no longer rebuke you, 

   but will rejoice over you with singing."

I love this verse. It reminds me that God tends to be a verb, not a noun. He's always "doing" something. Check out this verse. He's a Warrior who saves, he takes delight, he loves, he doesn't rebuke, he rejoices and he sings. I bet he has a voice similar to Josh Groban's. I don't know about you, but sometimes it's hard for me to believe he wants to SING over me. I mean, my husband sings to me here and there. My mom sang to me when I was a baby. People sang "Happy Birthday" to me just the other day. Owen sings songs to me and I must say they are all precious! But, God?! The God of the universe wants to not just sing about me, but rejoice about it?! Really?? He knows every past mistake, every current mistake, and every mistake to come and he still rejoices over me. If that doesn't give you a warm, tingly feeling, I don't know much else that will. 

That's unconditional love. Love that doesn't depend on how much I talk to him, how often I pray, or how "good" I was that day. That is a love that loves no matter what the conditions. So, you feel "unworthy" of this kind of love? You aren't alone. I've felt that way before. I'm sure Judas (the one that gave Jesus up to the soldiers) did. After all, he hung himself shortly after making that mistake. I bet Peter felt similar after denying he even knew Jesus. He didn't feel worthy to be crucified in the same manner as Jesus, so he asked to be crucified upside down. King David had an affair with a married woman, got her pregnant, then secretly had her husband killed in combat to cover up the mistake. Yet after all of that, God called him "...a man after My heart." 

God doesn't hold the same gavel we do. He doesn't hold past sins or regrets against us. He sees our hearts. He sees who we are meant to be. And he loves us as we are, not as we should be, because we will never be as we "should" be.

"Did you know every time you say, 'I love you' to God, he says, "Thank You?" Never confuse your perception of yourself with the mystery that you really are accepted."

Words for the Weary

It's compassion fatigue. It's well doer's burnout. It happens sometimes when a very dedicated, committed disciple of Jesus suddenly wakes up and realized he's tired - tired of giving, tired of doing, tired of serving. He finds that the joy of service is gone.

Ever feel like that? Most of the time, for me, there's always something that "ignites" the feeling of weariness. In my twenty years of being a Christian, I've gone through many cycles of fatigue. Of course we all go through physical and mental fatigue, but I'm speaking of spiritual fatigue. Have you been there? In fact, I've been there for the last couple of months.

I think it started when my husband was called out of town for what we thought may be a week or so, and turned out being 21 days. Oddly enough, you know the old saying, "...it takes 21 days to make or break a habit." I'd have to say I believe it. It took just that long for me to grow weary. Somewhere between working, caring for my three year old, cooking and cleaning, I felt something had to give. Obviously, I had to work, my three year old couldn't care for himself, eating was of most importance and my house had to be cleaned in order to maintain my sanity. So, what did that leave? My quiet times. Sure, they are some of my most treasured times. But, when you are the only "caregiver" at  home, working from sun up to sun down,  the last thing that seems appealing is waking up at 5am. So, I decided to put my 5am companion on hold until Nate returned home. After all, He is one Companion that has nothing but time to wait around on me, right? One week went by, two weeks, then the longest week of all: the third week. However, things didn't go quite as easy as I'd planned. When Nathan returned home, it didn't seem so easy just to pick up where I left off. Prayer came a little harder for me. Willingness to wake up early came more as a chore than a desire.


I'm happy to say, as of last night, I've gotten my ninety-fifth wind. Sure, most people call it their "second wind," however I've been through this cycle MANY times before. I like to call it "battle fatigue." You fight the good fight, become diligent in reading the word, wear a smile on your face everywhere you go, then all of a sudden your strength is zapped. Sometimes it happens because of circumstances beyond your control. Sometimes you get bitter towards God and turn away. Sometimes you make mistakes, some of them HUGE mistakes in your eyes, and you feel unworthy to stand in His presence any longer. I've been through all of the above reasons to give up. There was a time when I would allow myself to become weary, then feel guilty upon returning to my "diligence" in serving the Lord. Not anymore. I've grown to know there are seasons in life, and it's easier for God to understand us than it is for us to understand ourselves. I've come to trust that God really will "never leave or forsake me." I take comfort now in knowing that God already knows we will grow weary: "Let us NOT grow weary in doing good...Galatians 6:9." 


No matter what seems to be in between you and God right now, know he's just on the other side of it, waiting for you. Is it because he has nothing better to do than wait around for us? No, it's because He loves us so much, there is nothing He'd RATHER do! 

The Mirror of Erised

"The happiest man on earth would look into the mirror and see only himself, exactly how he is. Men have wasted away before it, not knowing if what they have seen is real, or even possible." - Albus Dumbledore


    In honor of the newest and final movie of the Harry Potter series debuting this week (enter excitement here), I thought I'd dedicated my blog today to it. These movies have faced a lot of heat from the religious world, among others. As some would see them as an "introduction" into a dark world, I see them as a unique way to learn life lessons, but more importantly, spiritual lessons. I'm not real sure why people tend to believe God can only use church, gospel music, and "hell, fire and brimstone" preachers to reach people. I like to think of God as "outside the box." I believe He enjoys seeing us take spiritual lessons from things that would otherwise be considered "taboo."


    Harry Potter is definitely considered a "taboo" to the Pharisees of the world. I can imagine "the mirror of Erised" would be labelled the same. It's a magical mirror that was hidden away in a room that was for safe keeping. Harry, being the mischievious boy he is, stumbled across it. He would frequently go back and visit this mirror. What was the lure that had him returning again and again? He could see his family in this mirror. The Mirror of Erised  shows the "deepest and most desperate desire of our hearts." The happiest person in the whole world would look in the mirror and see a reflection of exactly the way he or she is. Inscribed across the top of the frame is the following text: Erised stra ehru oyt ube cafru oyt on wohsi. Reversing the inscription and rearranging the spaces produces: I show not your face but your heart's desire. Dumbledore warned Harry about gazing too long upon this mirror. He told him he had seen many men waste away in front of it, seeing things they most desired but could never have.They began to prefer seeing those hidden desires fulfilled in that mirror than their own realities. 

     How often do we look upon our past, wishing to go back? Some of us may wish to relive our high school days forever. Others may desire to turn the clock back and mend a relationship with a parent before it was too late. And some would rather give up their responsibilities, bills, work, etc. to reflect on how easy life was as a kid. Others may have some deeper horrors in their past they'd like to go back and erase. No matter what the reason, we could  all learn something from Dumbledore's warning: "Looking into the past gives us neither knowledge or truth." Let's stop looking back and learn to face today as the best yet to come.

If you haven't seen the scene with Harry and Dumbledore, or you just want to watch it again (like me), you can see it below.

"Religious conviction: (n) an act from which men never do evil so completely and cheerfully"

Galatians 5:12

I could wish that those who trouble you would even cut themselves off!

Phillipians 3:2

"Watch out for those dogs, those evildoers, those mutilators of the flesh..."

In the verses above, that was Paul writing. He was apparently NOT a fan of "legalists." I believe Paul and I would've had a lot in common. You can almost sense his letter was laced with pure disdain for these people. After all, they were the main culprits in this day that would cause people to fall away from following the Lord. Isn't it pretty much the same way today? I see it all too often. Someone stops going to church because they made a mistake, but feeling forgiven by God isn't all they have to cope with. They would have to walk down the isles of piercing judgement if they went back. The cutting eyes of those who wouldn't dare make a mistake. What about the people who believe differently from us? Are we quick to throw stones at them, appalled they would believe something other than our "truth," or do we love and befriend them despite their religious preference? 

People don't want to hear as much about what you learned in your bible study this morning, as they want to feel like you're listening to them. They don't want to hear how God's working in your ministry as much as they want you to minister to them. They don't want to hear how great your God provides for you as much as they want to see you give it back. Actions speak louder than words. If you are preaching about how great God is, and how he is in constant control of your life, but you are the laziest worker at your job, you just cancelled out your words. You see a homeless man out on the street, but you dare not stop to speak or give some money, but you'll say to him, "God Bless You." You just taught him that your God is one who will say "hi" but never intervene in his life. Good job. Sometimes we are the only experience someone will have with Christ. What experience are you teaching them? Below are two different "doctrinal" beliefs...choose your side and stand firm in it....I'm a "Sola Fide" believer til the day I die!

Legalism, in Christian theology, is a sometimes-pejorative term referring to an over-emphasis on discipline of conduct, or legal ideas, usually implying an allegation of misguided rigour, pride, superficiality, the neglect of mercy, and ignorance of the grace of God or emphasizing the letter of law over the spirit. Legalism is alleged against any view that obedience to law, not faith in God's grace, is the pre-eminent principle of redemption. Its opposite is the doctrine of Sola Fide, which is the traditional Protestant view that believing in Jesus Christ is the only requirement for receiving eternal life.

Sola fide (Latin: by faith alone), also historically known as the doctrine of justification by faith alone, is a Christian theological doctrine that distinguishes most Protestant denominations from Catholicism, Eastern Christianity and some in the Restoration Movement.

The doctrine of sola fide or "by faith alone" asserts God's pardon for guilty sinners is granted to and received through faith, conceived as excluding all"works", alone. All humanity, it is asserted, is fallen and sinful, under the curse of God, and incapable of saving itself from God's wrath and curse. But God, on the basis of the life, death, and resurrection of his Son, Jesus Christ alone (solus Christus), grants sinners judicial pardon, or justification, which is received solely through faith. Faith is seen as passive, merely receiving Christ and all his benefits, among which benefits are the active and passive righteousness of Jesus Christ. Christ's righteousness, according to the followers of "sola fide", is imputed (or attributed) by God to the believing sinner (as opposed to infused or imparted), so that the divine verdict and pardon of the believing sinner is based not upon anything in the sinner, nor even faith itself, but upon Jesus Christ and his righteousness alone, which are received through faith alone. Justification is by faith alone and is distinguished from the other graces of salvation.

Albus Dumbledore

"...He who watches over you will not slumber." Psalm 121:3



I'm about to do something super taboo in the "religious" world. I am about to compare God with Albus Dumbledore. If you are unaware who that is, he is the Headmaster at Hogwart's University in the Harry Potter books and movies. I can hear it now: "GASP! How could you compare God to a character who is a wizard that practices witchcraft?!" Well, here's how.

Back in Jesus' day, He was very disturbed by the Pharisees. They were a group of religious people that knew the scriptures up one side and down the other.But they knew it so well that they had all of these ideas about how things were going to happen: what Jesus would look like, how the prophecies would all go down,etc. In essence, they "humanized" the Gospel and made it make sense to them in their own minds. They must've missed the part of scripture where God says, "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways."


I feel we have the same problem today. People like to think God can only be found in a church, doing church things or reading your bible. Yes, God can be found there, but is by no means limited to those confinements. I like to believe that God is joyful when we can find Him in other things we enjoy throughout life. The bottom line is that some people will never step inside a church. Others will never pick up a bible. Still others will never allow you to entertain a conversation about God, religion, or anything of the sort. So, to you dear religious one, my question is this...is God not able to reach that person through any other means? God writes the Gospel not in the Bible alone, but also on trees, and in the flowers and clouds and stars.....and Harry Potter movies.


I must confess. I watch the Harry Potter movies almost every night. Now, they are 3 hours long so it may take me three nights to finish one movie, but it's worth it. I've become very in tune with some similarities between who I think God to be, and the person of Albus Dumbledore. Dumbledore has one goal in mind: to protect Harry. Harry Potter was saved from death by his mother's sacrifice of love. She gave her life to save his. Dumbledore took Harry from birth and made sure he was put in a place where he'd be taken care of. Throughout the years at Hogwarts University, where Harry learned how to use magic in a good way, he was watched. Dumbledore was always watching. Harry found himself in many situations where he had to fight monstrous creatures and even Voldemort (the Dark Lord) himself. Dumbledore always sent help to him. And if sending help wasn't enough, there were times he would show up, cast Harry aside, and fight the battle for him.


The thing I love most about Dumbledore is his "presence." He let Harry live his life, make his mistakes, and get hurt. But in the end, Harry always learned something. He loved and cared for Harry...from a distance. But, when it came down to the battles between Harry and the Dark Lord, Dumbledore made his presence known. 

What a picture of our God. He never sleeps. He's always watching over us, preparing us, teaching us. He may seem far away at times. You may question why He's not answering at the perfect moment, but remember, He's there...and when the time is needed, He will make His presence known. And if the battle is too intense, He will cast you aside and take the reigns.

WATCH the battle here!

"Changes"

"If then there is any comfort in Christ, any help given by love, any uniting of hearts in the Spirit, any loving mercies and pity; make my joy complete by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in harmony and of one mind." Phillipians 2:1-2


Wow....it's been a while! Life has been busy for me. Hectic would be a more appropriate word. Nate works for an insurance company and is trained to handle "CAT" duty, better know as "catastrophe" duty. Needless to say, after the storms and tornados wreaked havoc on the Southeast, his assistance was needed desperately. So, he was deployed for 21 days. Yes, TWENTY ONE days! Now, I realize for you military spouses that this seems trivial, and in all respect to you and your separation time, it is! But for me, who was very dependent on Nate and his presence in mine and Owen's lives, this was TOUGH. God had a few courses up his sleeve that I needed to learn and by the end of it, I think I made an A! 


I battled at first mostly with my emotions, feeling heartbroken that my other "half" was so far away. The first week, I slept in fear every night. With a gun by my bedside, my alarm set, Tylenol PM relaxing my mind and soft worship music playing, I was certain I was finally safe. If the gun didn't scare them off, surely the piercing alarm would. If the alarm didn't succeed, surely my droggy state of mind would. And if all those things failed at scaring off an intruder, surely they'd hear the worship music and feel guilty! But God, in his love for me, new that wasn't healthy. He needed me in a position, stripped of all my securities, so I could learn to trust him, no matter what the outcome! I'm proud to say, after the first week, I began to trust a little more. I kept the gun in the drawer, not out in the open. I didn't feel the need to play music all night long. Now I still set my alarm, but hey, God created those for a reason! By week three, I was going to sleep peacefully and without a single outside light on (well, maybe the front light...but that's a huge improvement from the five spotlights I'd leave on every night). 


I learned to be more independent during this time. I braced myself to handle the storms that came through, knowing that I would be the earthly provider of Owen's protection. I took my punctured tire into the dealership to be fixed. I killed spiders on my own (first time with my foot, later with my hands)! I took Owen to Gatlinburg when our family trip plans feel through. I handled "creepers" in my neighborhood, all on my own (with help of the police). I worked through situations that I had never realized I had become so dependent on Nate to handle. My poor family and friends probably got a tearful phone call from me at least every other day, but I felt with each new day, I got stronger.Change is hard. Servanthood is tough. But, God wasn't going to let me off the hook that easy.


 It's easy to start to put your faith, trust and hope into the person you spend the most time with. It quickly becomes a habit to depend on them for your safety, comfort and well-being. But when all else fails, and yes, that person will one day fail you, whether by happenstance or purposefully, you will have God there to pick up the pieces. I feel that He wanted to make my joy complete. That couldn't be done if my life and happiness were still so dependent on my husband. 


What better time than the present to start to trust Him a little more. Believe He has your best interest at heart. Know that "He will not let your foot slip--he who watches over you will not slumber."


"God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to change the one I can, and the wisdom to know it's me. "

"The Great Intercession"

The High Priestly Prayer

17:1 When Jesus had spoken these words, he lifted up his eyes to heaven, and said, “Father, the hour has come; glorify your Son that the Son may glorify you, 2 since you have given him authority over all flesh, to give eternal life to all whom you have given him. 3 And this is eternal life, that they know you the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom you have sent. 4 I glorified you on earth, having accomplished the work that you gave me to do. 5 And now, Father, glorify me in your own presence with the glory that I had with you before the world existed.

6 “I have manifested your name to the people whom you gave me out of the world. Yours they were, and you gave them to me, and they have kept your word. 7 Now they know that everything that you have given me is from you. 8 For I have given them the words that you gave me, and they have received them and have come to know in truth that I came from you; and they have believed that you sent me. 9 I am praying for them. I am not praying for the world but for those whom you have given me, for they are yours. 10 All mine are yours, and yours are mine, and I am glorified in them. 11 And I am no longer in the world, but they are in the world, and I am coming to you. Holy Father, keep them in your name, which you have given me, that they may be one, even as we are one. 12 While I was with them, I kept them in your name, which you have given me. I have guarded them, and not one of them has been lost except the son of destruction, that the Scripture might be fulfilled. 13 But now I am coming to you, and these things I speak in the world, that they may have my joy fulfilled in themselves. 14 I have given them your word, and the world has hated them because they are not of the world, just as I am not of the world. 15 I do not ask that you take them out of the world, but that you keep them from the evil one. [1] 16 They are not of the world, just as I am not of the world. 17 Sanctify them [2] in the truth; your word is truth. 18 As you sent me into the world, so I have sent them into the world. 19 And for their sake I consecrate myself, [3] that they also may be sanctified [4] in truth.

20 “I do not ask for these only, but also for those who will believe in me through their word, 21 that they may all be one, just as you, Father, are in me, and I in you, that they also may be in us, so that the world may believe that you have sent me. 22 The glory that you have given me I have given to them, that they may be one even as we are one, 23 I in them and you in me, that they may become perfectly one, so that the world may know that you sent me and loved them even as you loved me. 24 Father, I desire that they also, whom you have given me, may be with me where I am, to see my glory that you have given me because you loved me before the foundation of the world. 25 O righteous Father, even though the world does not know you, I know you, and these know that you have sent me. 26 I made known to them your name, and I will continue to make it known, that the love with which you have loved me may be in them, and I in them.”

Did you know Jesus prayed for you thousands of years ago? He prayed this prayer for His disciples, and for "those who will believe in [Him] through their word." He prayed this prayer with your name in his mind, before he died on the cross with your face in mind. Take a minute and read this scripture again. This time, insert your name in place of "them." Imagine your Savior in the garden, on his knees, tears streaming down his face, as he intercedes for your life. It's a powerful scene that needs no explanation and is sure to touch your heart. A scene that shows just how much Jesus loved them, and you. How desperate He was to bridge the gap between us and God. Thank you, Lord, for your life of sacrifice that brought me where I am today.